he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
