belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize