he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Randomize
