can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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