it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
