I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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