He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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