Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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