I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
