Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
