New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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