I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
