found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
