No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Let's get the cat blown out
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
