Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
