Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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