that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
