He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
