I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize