I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Who wears a wallet chain?!
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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