I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I love having hate sex.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
