Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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