ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
