I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
