Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
