If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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