so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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