Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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