Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
