I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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