You really coming over, don't trick.
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
