So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We're too hungover to prance.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
