you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Randomize
