ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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