I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
