Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
