so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
