Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
