Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
