i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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