he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize