So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize