I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
