If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
