i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
