I must be too annoying 4 u.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
This is my gift to your gina
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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