do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
