Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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