yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
It's official drugs can't kill me
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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