so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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